We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize