Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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