i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
