After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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