i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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