just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
