it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Randomize
