you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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