So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
