Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Randomize
