some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
