so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
