Ambien. No doubt about it.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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