you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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