I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Randomize
