God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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