You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
