Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
