Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
