I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize