Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
either way he was missing a nipple.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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