you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
