So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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