remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
