I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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