And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
