oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
