is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
