If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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