I just made out with a guy for $7.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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