I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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