i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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