So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize