we're blogging at a bar
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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