I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
operation harelip BJ is a go
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
