So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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