Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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