Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
