While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I would fuck him just for his dog
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
