margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
