i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
