dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
