Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
