how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
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