barbara walters just said penis...
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
