laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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