Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
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