he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Just high enough for therapy.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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