Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
