He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
