so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize