the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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